Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize