I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Randomize
