On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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