I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Randomize
