I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I think weed is turning my hair brown
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
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