But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Randomize