Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
