Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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