break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
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