i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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