I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
If that was your dad, he is hot
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
