Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
So much Jack, so little girl.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Randomize