I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
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