He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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