dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
She announced her abortion via fbk
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Randomize