I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Randomize
