what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Randomize
