you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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