I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
