Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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