I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
Randomize
