This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Randomize