Screwed.edu
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
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