how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
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