it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
my poor anus
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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