She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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