I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
