Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
