When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Randomize
