Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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