I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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