i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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