kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I use my feet as sexual weapons
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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