Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
