i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
he laminated a picture of his dick.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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