so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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