Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Randomize
