Three words: puerto rican gang bang
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
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