I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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