Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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