Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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