Christians are straight up FREAKS
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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