Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
