We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Randomize
