Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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