go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Randomize
