I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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