I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
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