I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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