I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
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