I love black thongs
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
