My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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